"It's in the terminal stages of development"

That's what the doctor told me, my twin, Cheryl and I had been diagnosed with a rare and incurable disease, only available to those with an IQ of 150 and above. Infected with Contemnocucus, Cheryl and I will now face countless disorders and difficulties throughout our daily and the rest of our lives. The Contemnocucus package comes along with side effects which include: an extraordinarily low tolerance level for stupid people, inability to accommodate with idiots(neither can live while the other survives), extreme prejudice towards morons and so much more.

So let's start of with an incident that no doubt has left several permanent scars against the life of my poor friend, JieHui, being shuai and good in sports, he no doubt attracted attention while on the train. While merely glancing around the train looking for fellow schoolmates, his was so unlucky as to make eye contact with this mainstream girl who was fat, pimpled and just plain ugly, the girl immediately assumed JieHui was checking her out, she actually giggled and tried to look cute (but failing miserably) by sticking out her index and middle fingers, putting them to the side of her left eye, then she..she..she..she smiled. JieHui nearly died, he was choking, no doubt caught between the need to vomit over the train floor and the importance of not ruining his adidas shoes. I don't dislike fat people, really I don't, however it's fat people who are stupid enough to believe themselves to actually be attractive that disgust me.
So I made a flowchart to clear things up whenever a girl has a HOT/shuai guy looking at them.

No shit.

However I don't dislike ugly people who work hard to lose weight, in fact I respect them. I dislike HATE stupid mainstreamERs, I don't hate them all, I have really good friends who are mainstreamERs, I just really don't think it's necessary to type like a friggin' retard, dunnchhiiexx euuiiexx aqqriiexx lorrhhiiexx? I mean honestly do you stupid people have any idea how idiotic you all are?! I mean why sink yourselves any lower?! Is it really so hard to type, "don't you agree?" Why the excessive and unnecessary spam of the letter x, is it one step closer to being a porn star?

Next is the way they like to smile and take pictures, is it necessary to drape hair over your eyes and shove the camera so close to your foreheads? I really don't see how that makes the picture look any more pleasing, unless of course you dumb mainstreamERs' definition of beauty is to like an asshole with a swollen head and no eyes. Then is the way they smile, some of you mainstreamERs aren't even close to ugly, yet you have to suck in your lips and squint as though you're constipating, what is wrong with you people. Really if Singapore's future is put into your hands then..OMG!! I can't bear to visualize. Oh right, I forgot, that's why we're here, to make sure the future doesn't go into your hands.

Ah well.. Why am I getting worked up? Oh yes and, can one of you other BLOG owners come up with a quiz to do?! Oh yes, more pictures(:

My classmate who I have no intention of Revealing becaUSe Such things are supposEd to be aLL private.

Rainy day smudgy effect thingy.

A wHOLE new world. Bad pun, sorry):

Reminds me of my twin, Cheryl the NICE COCK.

Hehe.. PistaCHIOs..

Remember Cheryl hates idiots, so don't be one, if you already are, CHANGE while you still can, if not either let Cheryl kill you or tune in next time for Stanley's GuIDE to SucIDE. Cool, it rhymes(:

A Simple Conclusion:

999>1000

No seriously. Here I'll show you a simple comparison. On the left is 999th day and the right is 1000th day. Green meaning positive and Red negative.

999th day - 1000th day

Woke up at 6am - Woke up at 6 am
Mom fetched me to school - Took public transport
One bag containing almost nothing - Full NCC uniform in bag.
No lessons - NCC training
Kaihui - Russell
Size 11 Bball shoes - Size 8 NCC boots
DSA camp shirt - NCC top folded sleeve
NUSHS berms - NCC bottom with 2 buttons missing

Ah Wanyu just appeared(strategic location), guess she's late for uniform group training too. Where was I? Oh yes.

Get to climb pyramid and be imba tall - Eman, Xavier, Eugene, I refuse to continue.
Swing from platform to platform - Swing broom from side to side(sweeping)
Guitar ensemble and singing in ENGLISH - SJAB and NCC commanding in MALAY
My hair gets mobbed - My hair gets left alone
Basketball with me - Basketball locked in class
Stuart - No Stuart

I think that's more than enough evidence that 999>1000. So what happened on 999th day?

Well I was a PARTY popper but the dumb popper(better term than rod/tube/pole/etc) went all slippery and stuff and wouldn't twist, so I had to wrap my arms around it and force then BANG!! I think I got confetti on Mrs. Kan. After that I went to the Bball court with frequent trips to the canteen for bandung, gawd i love that pink drink. Then, Stuart, Chongwei, Wenxiang, Clayton and I slacked together and chatted about our houses, this year's and the next's 2.4km sprint/run/jog/walk/crawl.

Then it was time to go off, Zikai was rather upset that he lent me his white DSA shirt instead of the black initium shirt, hehe.. Seriously I think your CCA should be more helpful, I cant believe that you all were actually given a position of leadership, don't make me laugh. I mean when told that we were leaving you all just scooted off to the bus. There was like what, so much stuff to carry? Cones, bottles, kites and so much more. Some of us without leadership position could just not lift a finger and choose not to help, technically we weren't involved in the preparation. But we couldn't bear to abandon the people who deserved leadership. I needed to drop snide comments then you people bothered to start helping.

Bus trip was humourous, Donovan was threatening us to say we like him or else he'd spam the siren of the loud-speaker. And halfway there we saw Eugene outside, and his expression when he realized we existed was so funny. When unloading the cargo and logistics there wasn't any difference, your whole CCA basically just walked off, I'm sure if each member just carried a measly 2 packs of mineral water bottles, we could finish everything in one trip but no, you all would rather go enjoy the shade.

Ms. Chua was telling me that after guiding 8 classes would I then know how tough being a teacher is. I say blasphemer, she only has a class of 25 while I have 25 multiplied by 8 then divided by 3, however we(Kaihui, Raghav and I) still managed to control the classes and get them going better then the netballers, 13 minutes to start a match. And yeah, they could only play 2 to 5 minutes cos they were late, late my donkey. A CCA with better ball control should have taken over, like Basketball or Soccer, after all we do have more balls, both figuratively and literally.

That's basically it for the interesting things of the day, I not a retard, I don't intend to bore readers with unnecessary boring stuff. Oh did I mention that Lewis nearly killed Weiren? He didn't inform Weiren to hold on tight on the swingy thingy, and Weiren slid off.

Oh right.. The enlightening day, well I forgot what happened that day, seeing as the very next was also enlightening. All I remember was that we were transferring balloons.

Soon I'll get my phone screen repaired and more memory then I'll start taking then posting pictures, maybe. I'll consider. Oh yes, I wanna do a quiz, I'm bored and stuff, can one of you other BLOG owners come up with one?

A Simple Conclusion: Bye.

And on the seventh post Stan..

..realized 3 great truths..

Guess I'll list it chronologically(ooh.. big word):

0. Lisa's and Lina's popularity in comparison are equal.
1. Yanling's head is unnaturally bouncy.
2. Hanisah's likes to mock disabled people.
3. Japanese girls are extra chio.

What? Isn't that 3 great truths? Weirdo.. Oh right time to talk about the great truths. Today's day was enlightening and eventful so it deserves a post to itself and this post ain't it.

"Lisa or Lina? Pick one. Choose wisely." Tough don't you agree? Several other people also faced such a dilemma when such a question was directed at them.

I asked several people from throughout the levels this question. And what did u know, it was a tie. The most used reasons for choosing Lisa were that she displayed more traits of femininity and perhaps she was less LUSTful compared to Lina and more emotional. Most people chose Lina instead because they had a bad experience with Lisa and were thus naturally more biased against Lisa. But it still ended with a draw, pitifully..

Now while we were inflating(a better term then blowing) balloons, several balloons drifted towards the prominent head of Yanling, and to Wenxiang and my amusement and bewilderment, they were thrown off with such a FORCE of propulsion. Naturally, being MEN of science we decided to test out this strange wonder, however Yanling resisted out little experiment with such FURY. Determined not be defeated, we strengthened our assault against her well protected head, bombarding her with sieges after sieges after sieges of balloons. The odds were against us, three other heads had risen to join the battle, Debra's, Hafizah's and Hanisah's, Hanisah's was more of an distraction, seeing as she had no ability to halt our advance. Forced to retreat, we backed down, giving our FORCEs time to recoup our losses. We were defeated but the WAR was far from over, recruiting Jiaqing, we returned the onslaught with such a competence, that we fell Debra. The tables had been turned, cornering the hunted, we unconsciously led them to release their most competent and impressive warrior yet, the almighty Weiren appeared, choosing to target our least protected champion, he assailed Wenxiang with such MIGHT, that Wenxiang had little choice but to FLEE with Weiren HOT on his heels. Though amazed at Weiren's capability, I realized that it was no time to let my guard down, with their HERO gone, Jiaqing and I led a full-forced final confrontation against Yanling's party, easily annihilating Hafizah, we turned our attention to Yanling, when it seemed that winning was at hand. Weiren burst into the scene, he must have realized that the defense of Yanling was more important than the head of Wenxiang. Focusing on Jiaqing, he forced Jiaqing into a corner where he rid Jiaqing with EASE. This fatal inattention was all Wenxiang and I need, directing hit and run, guerrilla attacks against Yanling's front, Wenxiang gave me enough time to sneak behind Yanling. It was a PERFECT pincer attack, with a quick and powerful strike of balloons, I delivered the finishing HIT(a better term then blow), with her hairdo seriously messed up, it was clear that Wenxiang and I were the triumphant champions of this WAR, a WAR which would go down in the annals of historical battles.

"It's never completely silent and i'ts* never completely dark. There are always stars that shine and other people who lie awake like you, lying in their beds and waiting for the light to come."
*oh god, next time there's a fuckin' red underline can you just bloody check it?!
No I don't think i'ts** comforting, have you ever met blind or deaf people, do you even know what i'ts** like to be in complete silence or darkness. The feelings of lacking one of your senses, have you any idea how frightening it is? I figured you didn't, if not why would you post such a unsentimental post. For these unfortunate people, i'ts** always night. But do you care? Of course not.

**all instances of i'ts were purposely and typed with the intention in mock the person's abilities.

Of course there are always stars that shine, isn't that like what they do? They shine. Yet another pointless statement you added in to make it seem longer. Comforting? My donkey. And there's like what, a few billion stars out there? "There are always stars that shine", of course there are, the odds of that not happening are like emptying a bottle of water into the ocean and managing to get the very same water molecules back when you refill the bottle. Pitiful..

I don't feel like colouring this paragraph.. Really I don't.. Sorry..

Yeah, people lying awake, for instance in the hospital, where someone is terminally ill, laying there, praying, pleading, begging, waiting for the light to finally come and end it all. End all the pain. Ever had a family member who was in his final stages of cancer, and death was imminent? No? I figured. Do know that the pain kept him awake, and that sleep was impossible? No? I figured. You know, when I saw him laying there struggling, it's really scary and saddening? Just several days before he was fine, dining with us and laughing along, and then, he's lying on a bed in a hospital, diagnosed with a sickness that's going to kill him. I could practically smell the sickness in the air. But do you care? Of course not. And just the next year, I lost my other grandpa the same way you described, lying awake then the light just came. You know stupid and painful it is seeing as I had made plans the night before to visit him in the retirement home, perhaps bring a box of chinese chess to keep him and his friends entertained, and someone has to phone me in the early morning to tell me that he passed away? And then when clearing out his things from the home I realized that he had a box of chinese chess in his cabinet, and it's like a fucking reminder of how I failed to ever play a game of chess with my own grandpa. But of course to people like you who are obsessed with bloody so-called comforting, precious and magical shit, do you care? Of course not. I fucking figured.

I edited the whole post exceeding that part, seeing as you people like colour, I do too(: Figured I shouldn't brood on the past, my grandpas won't like it.
And gah!! I'll post about the 1000th day tomorrow.

..and he rested on the sofa from all the posts which he had made. He colourfully depicted the 7th paragraph of the 7th post, and mass coloured it. Because in that he had finally fulfilled all his colourful duties which Janell created and tasked.